Monday, 27 March 2017

Bobby Bigot's Quran Quotes

No offence to anyone named Bobby. I just needed a name starting with B to go with the Bigot

This is a hypothetical series of events, and I wonder how many, if anyone at all can relate to this.

Bobby is a bigot. And anti Islamic bigot. He thrives of sharing memes and links mocking Islam and Muslims. It's a big laugh.

Bobby has a brainstorm. Rather than just sharing ready made memes and pics. Bobby wants to make his own. He want to create original content.

Bobby thinks he'll add a sense of realism to the Quran quotes by actually photographing there very pages they're written in. That's a powerful technique.

Bobby buys a Quran. He quickly finds the relevant verses. As the references are all too familiar to him. he takes pics of the pages. And posts them. He is pleased.

Bobby busies himself for a few days, finding Quran references from his bigotted friends and posting pics of the pages. He gets a sense of satisfaction.

Bobby soon runs out of 'controversial' Quran quotes. What is he to do. He searches through the book. He tries to find more. He's not having much luck.

Bobby begins to get comments on the pics he's posted so far. They question his narrative and make him less confident about his message.

Bobby needs help. He is too ashamed of asking his mates, who usually share a anti-islamic gag here and there. But he doesnt find it as funny as it used to be before.

Bobby turns to twitter, and tries to get reassurances from fellow bigots, who mock him for even trying to see an alternative point of view. He feels silly now

Bobby reassures himself, by increasing in sharing of anti-islamics. He avoids reading any replies to his post that promote thinking

Bobby wants to get his monies worth from the Quran he bought, he searches for more quotes, but finds very little to post about.

Bobby is frustrated now. Even more so as he now finds things in the Quran he actually likes reading. he is perlexed.

What does Bobby do next? It's not supposed be a romantic ending with Bobby becoming Muslim.
May be he does. But he probably doesn't

What I wan't to know is, are you Bobby?
Are you searching?

Sunday, 15 November 2015

How to get away with killing people

No seriously.

1. Join a political party. It helps if you have some money to spend and in making the right connections to get votes.

2. Make some popular promises to get voted in to government. Dont worry about keeping the promises. Just say sorry when you break them, and if possible, make a you tube video to make it seem more cool.

3. Once in government get your pals, like minded people in to your gang

4. Just to be sure no one can blame you individually get your friends in your group to vote for any decisions you take about killing people.

5. If they dont agree with you, dont worry. Use a bit of spin. The best available information at the time. To encourage them to support you.

6. Come up with some buzwords to make people you're about to kill less important and non-human like. Words like 'collatoral damage' have proven to work before.

7. If you are still worried about being blamed for the killing, let someone else do it on your behalf. Get some legal expert to muddle around with the definition and legal technicalities to confuse the general public.

8. Never say sorry for it.What can they do to you? Afterall everything you did was legal at the time. And even  if it wasnt, get a comittee to investigate, perpetually. And in the worse case you can get the queen to pardon you if all that fails.